"One day more... yes not only a quote from the fabulous Les Miserables (yeah I know, typical Drama teacher, oops!) but also a quote that strikes about every single emotion and feeling imaginable right now as I'm writing this. Stress, fear, excitement, anticipation - and that's to name just a few! How is there already only one day left of the summer holidays?!"
I always knew the six weeks would fly, and that it would be soon be time to pack away the jazzy summer clothes, iron my slighly posher teaching clothes and get planning! Also, joining a new school was always going to be different - new classes, a new timetable, new colleagues, and for me a new county! Due to several factors, I wasn't given my curriculum plan, schemes of work and other needed information that long ago. I had just a few days to get my lessons and schemes in order and yes, the panic soon set in.
It's strange that even when you have all the support you need and all the positive comments you could ask for from your friends, family and colleagues, it can still feel crazy. As an NQT it's difficult to know what to expect, to strike the balance between being and feeling like a 'proper teacher' this year but also sometimes feeling the exact same way as you did when you taught for the very first time! The daunting aspect of joining a new school, with hundreds of children's names, colleague's names, school routines, school timings and so on, are just a few of the pressures that begin to mount. I've had a few training sessions with my new school and have gradually picked up staff names and feel good. But then I think about next week when a pupil says, "Miss, you know the new science teacher, where can I find her at break today?" and then I'm stumped! In my head I'm thinking "I know, I chatted with her yesterday in the staff room, but what's her surname? Mrs... Mrs... Weaver? Or is it Witter? Uh-uh" And of course, I know I can't say "Oh Louise, yes she'll be in the staffroom Jimmy". I need to know firstnames AND surnames for every single colleague! Oh damn...
I'm pleased to say I've managed to plan all my lessons to survive my first two weeks, so that if (and they will) unexpected jobs, meetings or issues occur, I'll have that little bit more time to deal with them (she says, hoping!). However, it was a struggle to limit my workload. I began by planning Year 7 all the way up to half term until my partner asked me why. Why should I then spend the following days completing one year group per day, to result in having no last weekend of the holidays and entering the school year already stressed. Why not plan a few weeks to feel a bit more confident and prepared, and also be able to spend time with loved ones - the best of both worlds right? So that's what I did. Funnily enough, as I scrolled through my phone's photo gallery, I came across this quote I'd saved:
It made me think about the word 'perfect' - what does it even mean? What makes a teacher 'perfect'? Is it one that gives loads of rewards to make their pupils feel appreciated, the one that recieves the most A*s/9s or the one that runs the most extra curricular activities to make sure their pupils are challenged as much as possible? I came to realise that the past few days I was focusing way to much on being 'perfect' with planning, having every single lesson planned until October half term. Besides, if I had have done that for every year group, would the last
lesson be as creative, imaginative and innovative as the first? No. Because every brain has a limit. I have limits, you have limits, every person you interact with has limits. I think sometimes as teachers we feel the need to have everything sorted and as perfect as possible because we have the incredible-but-daunting power to change lives, to guide young people in the right direction for them and give the best education that ultimately they only have one chance to get.
So, what's the bottom line? I CARE about my students. When they enter my classroom they know that they are appreciated, listened to and that I want them to be the best versions of themsleves they possibly can. Surely, if they know and feel these things then if my PowerPoint isn't jazzy with awesome animations, or my resources sheets have to be shared because I forgot to print them after a busy morning, or I've forgotten how many words they need to write for their essay (yes, before you say it, they do have to write in Drama!), then it'll be ok?
So, to all teachers, new and experienced, yes, we have a fantastic job and its hard work, but remember you're human. Remember you have family and friends who need you too, and it's ok to have time to yourself. If you walk in your classroom and give it your all for the pupils sat in front of you, what more can you do?
*Slight disclaimer - I'm sure if you ask me in a few days, I'll be back to wanting to be the non-existent 'perfect' but peaks and troughs, peaks and troughs...*
All the best for the new school year - lets be there for them, be there for each other, and be there for ourselves. Over and out.
Miss B :)
Comments